Saturday, May 18, 2013

Therapy: You or They?

This morning as I was walking the neighborhood listening to thought leader Caroline Myss lecture on Intuitive Power, the question was posed “do you know how many people are in therapy because of you?” She goes on to say to forget about how much time in therapy you have to spend because of others, think about what you contribute to others pain.

Remember therapy does not always consist of a tiny office, once a week for an hour with a licensed social worker or PH.D.  Many people utilize self-therapy healthy as well as unhealthy practices such as exercise, meditation, talking situations out with friends, shopping, working excessively, withdrawal or self-inflicted injuries.

We are so consumed with this “oh, poor me” attitude of victimization, seeking validation for our emotions, our behaviors, our entitlement to receive because we exist and traversed a road.  We desire to race to the top in a hidden, competitive marathon where survival of the fittest reign as champions of glory.  Yet in reality, it is those individuals who do not constantly seek others approval or validation, for their actions and works who are truly the most fit and the strongest.  Instead of worrying on what others are doing and how to beat them, that individual takes pride in his/her ability to produce and live an authentic life reframing from the intent to zap others energy through pain, anger and hurt, denial or overwhelming drama.  This individual learns to work with the natural flow of all things, seeing and experiencing everything and everyone as an extension of the most high, infinite power source (which I like to call God Anu).  

This ultimate power becomes your devotion, your obsession, your addiction if you will which works in and through your life. This power does not consume you in the negativity of envy, jealousy, bitterness and apathy.   No this ultimate power brings forth a knowing, a courage of understanding that everything and everyone works together in one synchronous thought.  This is where you and I can truly be grateful and celebratory for all that is, all that was, all that will be, all that you and I have given and all that you and I are destined to receive and BE.

Peace, Love, Bliss
Renée Angelah

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Anu Cleansing: Day 1



I’m beginning to believe that the more calories I attempt to count, the less food I attempt to consume and the healthier I attempt to become is actually making me more anxious.  My body resonates panic in a trembling state of confusion.  It is confused after tapering off from 5 months of listening and responding to my body’s needs, I suddenly stopped responding accordingly and pulled it into a direction it is not ready.  With each denial, I become more depressed, repressed, oppressed and more likely to succumb to my addictions, comfort food and shopping.  And for what reason? In order to fit inside a superficial ideology that society has manufactured to make individuals feel unworthy of being loved.  

So here I lay weak, sad and anxious trying to conform to the “healthy weight” the WII Fit is telling me I should fall.  Consumed with a need to return to the time of yesteryear when I fit into the mold, when I had hair and oily skin, when my body was a size four trying to alter into a size two, that was what I knew, that body I was beginning to understand or so I thought. This new body I don’t know, this new face with no eyebrows and minimal graying eyelashes, peach fuzz upon my crown, 18 pounds of overweight cellulite.  I feel my head and it is weird, I touch my face and it is odd, I look at my body and I sigh.  I am angry, I am frightened, I am helpless, I am vulnerable in ways I never imagined.

Check out the 2nd Installment of 35 Series, 
Breaking of Anu Dawn: 35 Poems on Lulu